Better than Cupid.

Category Archive

The following is a list of all entries from the clients category.

So Blind but Good-looking Enough To Get Away with It

My last post was brief and yet so emo that I thought I’d make up for it today, right here, RIGHT NOW. Although really, I do like emo music and I tend to get dramatic at times (in a sarcastic yet witty way, really) just to massacre the whole hyperbole thing.

So anyway. On with the good stuff.

I have roughly five people in my match making list (four guys and just one girl) and because I have more guy friends than girl friends, can you imagine the headache I get scrounging around for prospective dates for the guys? It is nothing but networking and PR skills at their finest. (And did I mention how painful it could be half the time? Did these guys actually think girls grow on trees?)

There’s this one guy out of the four that gets to attract more girls. And call it favoritism but I have decided to zero in on him. Why not? He’s the one who gets more votes, anyway. Might as well give him the exposure. The thing is, this guy is painfully not-so-aware of how he affects the girls around him. He’s the underdog and yet the star at the same time. Isn’t that an exciting client to handle? (Now can you see why favoritism leaned towards him?) And, well, it doesn’t hurt that his body is to die for (monkee will attest to that, as she bore witness to THAT CERTAIN PHOTO of the guy that I posted in previous life — which is to say many, many weeks ago, really).

So this guy? I am doing everything to expose him to girls. It is taking all of me, all five feet and one and a half inches of me, to just tag him along and make him move his ass. He promised Sunday, maybe Sunday he’ll be free. And Sunday suddenly seems like such an exciting, fun-filled day. The only tricky part is actually inviting the single girls, since even the ones taken like to meet him. “Even if it’s just for his body,” one of those girls said. Her words, not mine. Yeah, I promise you.

A tap you on your shoulder: Say, do you think it would be more interesting if I actually posted some facts (basic but presented in an interesting fashion, of course) about my clients?


Can’t Blog. Blame Client.

Okay. So this match making stint? Pure weight on my shoulders right this very moment, as I type this down.

Things I Have Learned About Match Making

1. You cannot convince Vic to drop whatever it is he’s into right now for the sake of one blind date. It’s about as effective as giving chocolates to someone with diabetes.

2. Physical attraction plays a crucial part in the initial stage. Buyco is proof to that.

3. Your mother will tell you to stop match making because you’ll only end up sad and alone and lonely in the end. Did I mention sad and alone?

4. When you ask two of your friends (Ahem! Vic and Buyco) if they know someone who they can introduce to you, one suddenly becomes creative with excuses and the other suddenly decides to drop off the face of the earth.

Being a match maker is a tough, thankless job and you develop a lot of things along the way. Better PR skills, a thicker skin, determination, the drive to succeed, and resisting the urge to charge for the service.

The Saturday That Never Was

You know that Saturday I’ve been bragging about? The Saturday I said Vic would be having his blind date? That Saturday? Yeah! Well, it didn’t happen. What can I say? When your sibling is graduating, it can only mean one thing: You either get your ass over there or your family will disown you. So Vic had no choice but to drag his sorry ass. And you could tell he was regretful about it, too. Hopefully, he and Aleah could meet up some time soon. I’m beginning to think I’m losing my touch with all this match making stint.

I was going over the previous comments (not that there were many of them) and something about what Monkee said struck me. Hmm… Maybe it is high time to post pictures of both Ira and Vic (not shirtless, of course) here. The question is: When?

I Could but I Won’t: In Lieu of the Previous Post

It might have been ages since I last posted here and you can blame it on work. Not this match making stint but my real day job. But back to this business because let’s be honest. Match making is so much more exciting.

My other client friend, whose name is really Ira but I prefer to call him by his last name because Buyco sounds so much more kick ass. Booy-koh. That’s how it is pronounced. Say it one more time: Booy-koh. Totally kicks ass! So anyway. One of my friends actually asked me to set her up with him. And I was all like, “Are you sure? Are you really sure?” Buyco is a nice guy. Easy to get along with, can’t complain about his sense of humor and if there’s a night out or gimmick, you can rest assured he will pop up out of thin air. His motto when it comes to social extracurricular activities? This: I am ubiquitous. The thing is, the girls I recommend to him always back out. The reason can be summed up with one sentence. One very short sentence: He looks like a bad boy. Their words, not mine. I mean, if I were to describe the guy, I’d tell them “He resembles a grizzly bear in terms of looks but really. Everything else about him? A labrador.”

I am Little Ms. Match but Little Ms. Match tends to get lazy at times. So I just give Buyco my friend’s number and vice-versa. And voila! They are texting, people. Who knows what will happen when they meet face to face, right?

Oh, and heads up: The guy I mentioned in my previous post? *points below* He is about to embark on his first and a half blind date this Saturday. I am going to be there with him and shall try not too get too mesmerized by the sight of pasta and pizza so I can properly document this blind date I’ve cooked up for him.

And yeah, I could post pictures of him shirtless but I won’t, as I feel that would be tantamount to violating him. And as a conservative citizen of the world, I won’t. Unless someone pays me to.

Comments That Flew Off THEIR Mouths

I got to hang out with two of my girl friends last Tuesday night and what was supposed to be some knee-deep editing and revising turned out to be a session of pigging out and poking fun of each other. Until. Until I made a very thoughtful comment regarding how [bleep’s!] recent boy looks like one of my client/victim/friend. She got all excited and asked me to show a picture of said guy. So I did and we reached a mutual decision: Introduce the two of them and come what may. Amen.

Then I proceeded to tell them that this look-alike has a friend and because they were as much curious beavers as I am when it comes to anything or anyone new, we hopped on over to said friend’s social network profile. And then lo and behold! Furor came with torrents of not-so-wholesome comments. (Vic, what were you thinking when you put up that primary pic of yours?!) I thought my friends couldn’t have made more racket about Ira’s height. Boy, was I wrong. DEAD WRONG. Because upon seeing Vic’s primary photo? I resisted the urge to wipe the drool off their mouths. And I didn’t know whose eyes I should cover first, theirs or mine.

“He’s yummy! He’s yummy, Anna!” declared one of them. I then and there had a brain fart. True, that guy had a nice body but isn’t the brain sexier? (Sidetrack: Dear Conor, please marry me today.)

A couple more clicks on the other photos of Vic and all hopes of this fuss dying was beginning to wane. “He’s CUTE!!!” was another comment breathed on my left ear. When I’ve exhausted his gallery of photos, both of my girl friends actually requested that we go back to the pictures of him shirtless.

And here, I thought it was only guys who go through this kind of stuff. Had Vic witnessed that scene, would he have felt like a piece of meat amidst a pack of, say, wolves? Cute wolves but wolves nonetheless. With sharp teeth. Salivating. With a glint in their eyes. You get the idea.

*sidenote: Undergoing MyBlogLog Verification

World, Welcome Little Ms. Match

What started as an interest grew into a joke. And then it got bigger — BAM! Just like that. I realized, “Hey, I could really help match people.” So here is this blog, kicking off what I hope would be one big ball of adventure.

Right now I am helping two guys look for romantic prospects. This is a quest, as I have realized I have a shortage of girl friends who I can set up with them. The answer to this woe-is-me issue? Networking! Friends of friends… of friends, if I get desperate. Ira and Vic have given me their blessings in posting their pictures here but I haven’t. Yet. Not because I am so busy but because I am a lazy ass who thrives on procrastination. But no worries! By next week I’ll be putting up photos of them and brief descriptions. For now: Heads up, ladies! Who knows, one of those two guys might just be who you’re looking for.

On the other hand, they may not be your type. At first. But then opposites attract, right? I mean, stranger things have happened…